Operation Matter Over Mind?...!
If there is one thing I have come to realize about myself over the years it is that I am an unbelievably strong individual. Did you know that my legs can bench over 70 pounds?
Just kidding.
While I haven’t faced any major life-altering or tragic events (thank God), I have felt the struggle of my heart, mind, body, and soul in a number of ways over the years. Each time, I bear the burden: I let the feelings ruminate for a bit, my body takes it out on me in its usual ways (I stare at walls and sleep like crazy), and then I get over it - usually within a very reasonable amount of time. And each time, when my smile regains its usual luster, I find myself so thankful that I have strength to draw on. KB and I have had plenty of conversations around the idea that everyone faces trials in their life - some are small and some are huge - but we all deal with them differently. Some people never get over the smallest things and other people would never let on what they’ve been through.
We decided that it’s mostly a matter of attitude and perspective. If you are lucky enough to have been given a little perspective, either by the voice inside your head or a tough-love friend on the outside, you’re gonna be justttttt fine. And, if you have the right attitude and realize there are better ways to spend your time than moping about, you’ll be back on that horse in no time.
Unfortunately, I’m learning it isn’t always so clear cut. Sometimes it isn’t about moping in sadness - it’s about losing yourself in imaginations. When I don’t get over something I’m not crying about not having it, I’m too busy going on with my life as if I got it anyway…life in my head that is.
Do you know that it took me almost twice as long to get through my readings this weekend because I was too busy drifting off into Zahra-Zahra land? Right. No more of that.
So I have a new challenge for myself (if you want to join in, please knock yourself out…I could use the company) - I’m going to actually, physically focus on living outside of my head. For the next…week?…(is that too ambitious?)…I’m going to strictly forbid wall-staring, window-gazing, daydreaming of any kind. Every time an unsanctioned thought enters my head, I’m going to “catch it, bin it, kill it” (Swine Flu ads in London…).
Seriously though - I am going to see if I really can exercise some self-control and focus on what’s real and important now. Is this a good idea? Part of me is arguing for the positive-thinking/if you dream it’s possible outlook. Why settle for what I can’t have when I can start making moves to get what I want?
But the other part of me is tired of living in a cloud and only prolonging an inevitable realization that even I can’t always get what I want. Is it really better to live in reality? I guess I’m about to find out…
