26 y.o. Pleads Guilty to Arson; Feels Remorse
I’ve burned enough bridges during my short stay here on Earth and right now, I’m feeling particularly unhappy about that.
I mean, I know that when I’m upset I swear that there must be no purpose for the other side besides destroying my dignity so of course, burning the bridge that connects me to such a potentially dangerous force is not only the smart and responsible thing to do - its my duty…I owe it to my self-respect.
But, when the fire cools and the drama is over I wonder if it’s ever a smart thing to sever ties with someone you once knew?
I mean there’s the political/diplomatic side to it - you never want to give anyone a reason to hate you/keep your friends close, your enemies closer - but I’m not really into that. Hate me if you want, I’ll make a name for myself with someone who won’t only take your word for it.
Then there’s the manipulative side to it - what if I need something from you later? Best to keep you around just in case. But….mmm not really into that either, I have plenty of friends and worst case, I don’t mind gettin’ ma hands dirty.
All of this I can handle. It’s when I miss someone - their presence, what they once offered me - that I begin to question if it was really worth it to let them go. Is my ego that important? Is it so necessary to make a statement that ostentatious? Is there really no other solution? As I come to realize that not everyone I surround myself with is so easily and quickly replaceable, the bridge-burning starts to look like a childish and irrational approach to solving differences.
So I watch and learn to see what other people do. Take MLA for example, whose philosophy is to acknowledge that everyone has a narrative, just like you do. She doesn’t burn bridges - she creates dialogue, listens, and pushes through until she reaches an understanding. And above all else - she invests in people.
Let’s apply:
If I believe that I am worth investing in, and if I believe that we are equal - both with something to offer - than are you not worth investing in too? What makes me better than you, that I can decide to throw away what is between us? Why not invest the time to understand, reconcile, and move forward - not for the political or personal advantage, but simply so that I don’t have to miss you?
It’s revolutionary. And humbling.
I mean, why NOT? What is achieved with bridge-burning that is not achieved in investing the time to resolve differences? I think back to the relationships I’ve ditched and while I do believe that at least one of them was warranted, the rest I wish I’d salvaged.
Sigh. And now for the part I loathe:
Time to grow up, z.
