The Inequity of Never
As I was lying on my bed, contemplating life and avoiding this damn Texas heat some thoughts began to plague me.
I’m not one to be “sad” in life and most things don’t phase me much. Stuff happens, good and bad, and you learn to deal with it as it comes, appreciate the good times and take the not-so-awesome times in stride because, in all likelihood, the Big Guy is probably just gettin’ his dose of jokes in at our expense.
But today, the idea of “never” entered my head, and so began the inner workings of my mind. What does never mean? The dictionary on my phone has some pretty depressing results: not ever, at no time, not in any degree, not under any condition.
So we know it’s a negative word. Never means that under no condition, no degree, ever, at any time will ___ happen. It will never be the case that I will be alive in the year 2500.
It’s all good I can live with that.
What I am having a hard time living with is the less explicit, yet no less severe nevers that do exist in my life, or in yours: she will never walk again, you will never have your stuff back, I will never see him again.
It’s the sleight of hand, twist of fate, way-things-must-be lawlessness of never that really makes it hurt. It’s so unjustified, right?
But I feel that perhaps the most difficult aspect of never to swallow is that it lacks a nemesis. What can match the finality and absoluteness of never? I’ll tell you what can: forever.
Forever can save us from never!! Well, no it can’t, but at least it approach life with the same force, the same zeal that never does. For every never that robs us, a forever will come and enrich us!
Wait, no it won’t. Because, aside from the Walt Disney edition of Merriam-Webster, forever (meaning: for a limitless time, at all times, continually) doesn’t actually exist.
Think about it: what do you know that lasts for an unlimited amount of time, guaranteed? Burger King’s latest deals are always for “a limited time only,” we say love lasts forever but one look at the stats in this country and you KNOW that’s a lie, your teeth won’t last forever (mine already hurt :( ), your stuff won’t last forever, hell even your soul abandons your body at some point. Nothing lasts forever because forever doesn’t exist.
Never mind the fact that all of the other binaries exist fully and in their own right: bad and good, happy and sad, black and white, yes and no, you and me. We are all here, with our own qualities, complementing one another, existing with each other, canceling each other out. Bad is acceptable because we know that good, its equal, comes around every now and then too.
But never and forever, that’s false advertisement. Or rather, the forever portion of it is false. Never - never’s got a lot of integrity. That shit stays.
And the thing is, the falsehood of forever sucks, but it would be bearable if never was just as fake. But it’s not. Never, the negative half of the binary, is the one that is absolute. In fact, never is…forever.
That’s messed up, Big Guy: not okay with this concept of never again. And don’t tell me You are the “forever” in this equation. That’s cheating. Doesn’t work that way.
Readers: tell me you have a comeback, or at least that you’re not feeling as depressed about never/forever as I am right now.
It’s just not cool.
